A guy IM’d me last night on a dating site. This morning, I’m left trying to remember how and why he brought up the topic of his father being a gay, excommunicated Mormon. Hrm.

A friend writes:

“So for the last date I went on, the guy and I were trying to find a place to meet after work to have a drink. I wasn’t familiar with the area, so I looked to him for suggestions. He didn’t have any, so he just suggested we “meet on the corner.” Keep in mind it’s like 40 degrees out, windy, dark, and I get to stand on a street corner in San Francisco waiting for this dude. Pretty awesome.”

It’s official: I have dated a 30-something with wheelie shoes.

According to Jezebel, the Knot.com’s “Signs He’s About To Propose” are really just signs that he’s an adult…or gay. Check it out!

So, some guy sent me this unsolicited (first) message on a dating site:

What do I write in these things? Since you’re OK with musings, I’ll go from there. Someone messaged me about my handle, floatinglife. That got me thinking about Six Records of a Floating Life, a Chinese novel (19th C.) and this concept. It includes the usual associations: impermanence, insecurity, and change. But I’m reading this books, both for work and myself, on critical thinking, and I just finished a section on fair-thinking (taking other p.o.v. with scientific openess & without prejudice) which relates to impermanence. Critical thinking may require changing one’s beliefs as new information arrives. Beliefs are usually very personal; seeing their impermanence is seeing our own.

Critical thinking also requires courage that may not be viewed as diplomatic at work–I see my own POV as an INFJ getting in the way of doing what must be done. It can also hinder my ability to envision better ways of doing things. I endeaver to be more rational.

…And that’s the message in its entirety. O-kay…

So, I received this pendant (?) from a guy, with no kitschy irony intended. To be clear, it’s shaped like an apple, features the Empire State Building, the Statue of Liberty, and the Chrysler Building, and is engraved with my name.

My mother saw no humor as I described this white elephant, but did take the opportunity to remind me what an ingrate I am.

Yeah.

A cringeworthy video dating profile.

So, it’s a first date with a guy I met online.

After a few minutes of easy conversation I say, “I feel like I already know you.”

I don’t mean this literally, but he responds, “Actually, you do. We’ve met. In fact, you’ve been to my house.”

He smiles broadly while I descend into anxious confusion and embarrassment.

Apparently I’m friends with his roommate.

Pro: Aw! He got me a gift!

Con: Aaaaand it’s sci-fi by Vernor Vinge. I guess the polite thing to do would be to read it, huh?

He claims he moved to California to sell his book…but I soon learn he doesn’t have a publisher. Or an agent. Or for that matter, a completed book.

He says he used to be more grandiose about this project. But, uh, what’s more grandiose than “selling” a comic-novel memoir you haven’t written yet?